As M Scott Peck opened in his classic The Road Less Travelled, “Life is hard.”
Life indeed can be very hard – dare I say extremely difficult and painful at times, and at the same time it can be extremely meaningful. What a challenge it is to sort through all the myriad of life’s issues struggling to make sense of it all and to wonder where you go from there - not an easy task.
The problem is not the problem, the problem is how we deal with the problem.
This is one of my favorite expressions because it is so true. The truth is that there certainly are problems in life and yet the challenge is how to deal responsibly and constructively with them. Most of the time the problem is in our internal process and we don’t even recognize it. Often the problem is due to needs and expectations not being met, denial and or repression of emotional pain, a lifetime of misunderstandings, premature conclusions due to faulty processing of how we have perceived things, and also to experiences themselves.
Therapy can hold different meanings to different people so therefore the therapeutic journey is often unique for each individual, couple, and family. I often express to people that therapy is a two-fold process – one, this is an environment that you will hopefully feel safe to sort and work through your issues in a meaningful and productive manner, and secondly that this experience can be one of learning new skills, enhancing self and other awareness, gaining new understanding and perspective that all leads to a healthier and more meaningful way of living. I strive very hard to make the time as meaningful and productive as possible.